Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Day 3: Pregnancy Photo

Day 3:  Pregnancy Photo

June 3, 2013

I love all of my pregnancy photos, but I chose these two to share today!

My pregnancy photos are so important to me because they are the only photos I have of Bo!

They mean so much to me!

I am so happy that I decided to take so many photos of myself while I was pregnant, and if I had known then what I know now, I would have taken even more photos!

You may not be able to see it, but I can clearly remember what I was feeling when these photos were taken!

I was so happy that my baby was growing inside of me!  I was so thrilled to have this miracle to call my own!

I was and am so in love with my baby boy, Bo!

Day 2: Pregnancy Test

Day 2:  Pregnancy Test

June 2, 2013

On 9.30.12, at around 10:30 P.M., I took this pregnancy test.  It immediately showed positive.

I was in shock and awe, but I was so happy!

I was thrilled!

I had my Unexpected Miracle!

I still have my Unexpected Miracle, but now he is also my Guardian Angel!

I love & miss him, daily!

Saturday, June 1, 2013

Day 1: Sunrise

June 1, 2013

Day 1:  Sunrise

I did not get to bed until after 2 A.M. this morning, so I was lucky to have briefly woken up to take this picture {then, I went back to bed}!

I am so happy that I did go take this picture, though, even though I was so tired.

This picture reminds me how lucky I am!  I am able to live another day, even though my baby boy is not!

I can live for him & me!

I can live my life to the fullest, since he did not get a chance to!

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

A boy & A girl - One year

Today has been one year since Justin and I started dating, and we are still going strong!

After all that we have been through.  Everything that could have torn us apart.  Everything that has torn so many relationships apart.

We are still together!

And, we are better than ever!

We are soulmates!

We are better together!

I love you, Justin, more than words can describe!

Happy 1 year anniversary!

Sunday, May 26, 2013

June 30 Day Photo Challenge

For the month of June, I have decided to do a 30 day photo challenge.

June 6, 2013 is Bo's EDD.  On this day, I should be welcoming my baby boy into the world, but instead I will be holding a memorial to honor & remember his life and his importance.

The whole reason for the photo challenge is to honor Bo's life.  To show the world that he is important, even if it is only to me!

If anyone would like to join me in doing this photo challenge, you are more than welcome to.  I would be honored to have you complete this with me, so that you can honor/remember your Angel too!

{If you do plan on completing this photo challenge, please let me know by posting a comment.  If you are posting on a blog,
Facebook page, Instagram, Twitter, etc., also leave the link or username, so we can all follow along with your challenge!}

Here is the photo/setup for the challenge:

  1. Sunrise:  I am not much of a morning person, but I am going to do my best to get up and watch the sun rise and even capture it in a photo.  {If you are not a morning person, take a picture when you wake up!  Show us how the day looks!  Please add city/state/country to the photo when it is posted!}
  2. Pregnancy Test:  This is my only proof that I was pregnant, so it is important for me to show this.  All I have is my pregnancy test and the paperwork from the doctors.  {If you don't have a pregnancy test or paperwork from the doctor, take a photo of something similar that is important!}
  3. Pregnancy Photo:  You cannot tell that I am pregnant in my photos, but I remember the changes in my body.  I remember these special memories as Bo grew inside of me, and I tried to capture these moments in photos.  {Share what you are comfortable sharing.  It does not matter if anyone can tell you are pregnant in the photo!}
  4. Name/Photo:  I don't have my ultrasound photos, but I love to see Bo's name, so I will be posting some photos of his name! {Again, share what you are comfortable sharing!  If you don't want to share your sonogram, post a photo of your baby's name. - If you do post a photo of your ultrasound picture, I suggest watermarking it before doing so!}
  5. Letter to baby:  I am going to write Bo a letter, telling him how much he means to me.  {Write your baby/child a letter!  You don't have to share it, if you don't want to!  You can share a sentence, a paragraph, the whole letter, or none of it at all!}
  6. Due Date/Angelversary:  June 6 is Bo's EDD.  On this day, I should be welcoming my baby boy into my arms and into this world, but instead I will be holding his memorial.  {Share your Angel's special dates!}
  7. Sacred Space/Shrine:  Bo's has a special corner in our bedroom.  All of his beautiful items that I have to remember him are put here.  {Does your baby/child have a special place in your room/home?  Would you mind sharing it with us?}
  8. Signs/Dreams:  Not easy to capture this in a photo, but I will be describing the dreams that I had that were my first indication of me being pregnant.  {Have you ever dreamed of your Angel or received a sign from them?}
  9. Poem:  I love to write, so I will be writing Bo a poem.  I may also share one of my favorite poems I have found online!  {What is your favorite poem for your Angel?  Did you write it?}
  10. Artwork:  I will be taking photos of the artwork I have done for Bo.  I am not very artistic, but I do love to doodle.  {Have you drawn/colored/doodled anything in memory of your Angel?}
  11. Symbol:  I have a couple of special symbols that always remind me of Bo.  {Any symbols remind you of your baby/child?  Angels, stars, butterflies, teddy bears, etc.?}
  12. Stuffed Animal:  When I was born, I was given a stuffed animal from my family.  I still have this stuffed animal to this day!  Bo has a couple of stuffed animals already, but he will be receiving another in honor of his EDD.  {Do you have a favorite stuffed animal for your Angel?}
  13. Clouds:  So soft, fluffy, and white.  I always thought about playing on the clouds when I was younger, bouncing around and laying on them.  Now, I think about Bo doing the same!  {If you are participating, would you mind taking a picture or some pictures of the clouds where you are?}
  14. Night/Moon/Stars:  When I left the hospital after my miscarriage, it was dark and cold.  It made my world feel even darker and colder.  I used to not be able to sleep at night for fear of nightmares.  Now, I try to embrace the night.  It is such a beautiful time, when you can see all the stars or the city lights.  {Do you enjoy the night?  Show us how it looks to you!}
  15. Light a candle:  I will be lighting a candle in memory of Bo and all other babies/children who have left this world too soon! {Please light a candle for all babies/children who have gone too soon!  Also, say a prayer or think positive thoughts for all the families that have to go through this pain!}
  16. Father:  In honor of Father's Day, I will be posting a photo of Bo's daddy.  {Honor the father of your child!  Or, because I know every situation is different, honor your father, the father-figure in your life, or the father-figure for your Angel!}
  17. Family portrait {before loss}:  I will be sharing some photos of my little family before our loss & while I was pregnant.  {What did your family look like before your loss?}
  18. Family portrait {after loss}:  Here, I will be sharing our new family photos.  Bo is still included in them, even though most people would not know it!  {What does your family look like now, after your loss?}
  19. Supportive family/friends:  I want to share my family & friends with you who have been there with me through everything.  {Who in your family/friends has been there for you?}
  20. Supportive Community:  So many groups & programs have helped me through this journey that I am on, and I want to share them, so that others can receive the support that they need.  {Where did you go for support in the community?  Was it online or in your area?}
  21. Jewelry:  I have a couple of pieces of jewelry that are very important to me and remind me of Bo.  {Do you have a special piece of jewelry that you wear?}
  22. Memorial Items:  This will be a photo of the collection of items I have received in memory of Bo!  {What items have you received to honor/remember your baby?}
  23. Treasured items from friends:  I have a couple of items that were sent to me from friends, just because!  These are the most treasured items, and I will be sharing a photo of them!  {What have you received that you treasure the most?}
  24. Memorial:  I will be posting a photo of Bo's memorial that I will be doing on his EDD.  {Have you held a celebration/memorial/funeral for your Angel?  If you don't mind, will you share your photos with us?}
  25. Special Place:  I always think of Bo when I visit a couple of places.  I will share these places in photos!  {Is there somewhere special that reminds you of your Angel?}
  26. Garden/Flowers:  I have not planted anything, yet, in memory of Bo, for fear of it dying, too, but I am thinking about it!  I do have a couple of trees/flowers/bushes that make me think of him, though!  {Did you plant a tree, flowers, or anything in memory of your Angel?}
  27. White Signs of Grief:  I will be taking a photo with my white sign of grief, and I will be submitting it to their blog.  {Here is how to submit!}
  28. Certificate of Life:  I will be posting Bo's Certificate of Life.  Another item that shows Bo's importance to not only me, but others.  {If you are participating, you can post your baby's Certificate of Life, Birth Certificate, Death Certificate, or whatever you are comfortable posting!}
  29. Blog/Facebook Page/Project:  Here I will be sharing the special projects that I started and am doing in honor of Bo!  {Please share your special projects; whatever you are doing to honor and remember your baby/child, while also helping other bereaved families!}
  30. Sunset:  On the last day of the month, I will post a photo of how  it looks in my part of the world when the sun goes down.  Will you show me it how looks in your part of the world, too?  {Please add city/state/country to your photo when you post it!}

Just so you know, if you want to participate, you are more than welcome to!  There are no rules and no expectations.  You do not have to share with anyone, but we would love it if you do!  Also, you do not have to participate everyday!  You can pick and choose what you want to do! <3

6 Months

Bo's 6 Month Angelversary was May 21!

All day long I was fine, until later that night, I was thinking about him, as I often do.

I just broke down in tears.  All I could think about was how I should be 38 weeks pregnant, ready to give birth to my beautiful baby boy! 

It is all I have been thinking about since his 6 month Angelversary!

I was able to order two beautiful pictures {one for my baby boy & one for my brother}, since I won a gift certificate from Catherine @ The Sacred Seashore.

Bo's beautiful sunset on the beach photo from The Sacred Seashore! <3

James' beautiful sunset beach photo from The Sacred Seashore!

I love these photos!  They are both so gorgeous!

My fiance picked Bo's photo out {and I think he made an awesome choice}!

Mommy & Daddy love & miss you, Bo!  Until we meet again, baby boy!

Friday, May 24, 2013

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day!
May 12, 2013

For Mother's Day, I enjoyed the day relaxing, then went out to grab dinner with my fiance.

My fiance, our dog, and me on Mother's Day!

I called my mom to wish her a Happy Mother's Day!

Out of my family, she is the only one who wished me a Happy Mother's Day as well {not including my fiance}!

I was a little hurt that none of my other family called, text, or sent me a message to check on me this Mother's Day!  I guess I was just expecting a little more from them, but it is okay!  I had a wonderful day, anyways!  I have a wonderful community who supported me, thought about me, and sent me messages.

I even received some gifts for Mother's day from some of my friends.

Catherine from The Sacred Seashore & Gabriel's Garden sent me this photo!  It is so beautiful! <3

Bo's name was included in this photo, taken by one of the Moms, Brenda, who participated in the Mother's Day Name Event!  {I will be posting all the photos that I received through this event later in the month!}

Ballons on the beach from Gale @ Fittsies' Angel Balloons.  So beautiful! <3

You can see Bo's name on the bottom left side! <3

Painting from Kyla @ Tossie's Tree!  She is so talented with her paintings!  <3

Bo's Name plaque/statue from Catherine @ The Sacred Seashore & Gabriel's Garden! <3  I absolutely love this!  I stare at it daily! <3
Bo's Block from Maura Lynn's Baby Loss Memorial Blocks!

Here are some things I did myself:

I love seeing his name, and I thought this was so beautiful! <3  

A drawing I did on 5.10.13, while thinking about Mother's Day!  {No, I am not a artist! Please do not criticize my child-like drawing techniques!}
The status I wrote on Facebook for Mother's Day:

Happy Mother's Day to all the amazing Moms! 

To all the Moms who have children on Earth,

& especially to those who don't! 

To all the Moms who have children living at home,

& to those who don't! 

To all the Moms who want children, but cannot or have not 

had any! 

To all the Moms who have no children, but take care of 

everyone else's! 

To all the Moms who adopted instead of birthing! 

You are all Mothers! You are all beautiful! 

Happy Mother's Day to you! 

Happy Mother's Day to my baby boy!  Without you, I would 

not be a Mom!  Thank you, Bo, for making me a Mother!